Peace and Contentment for the Single Christian Woman

I think it goes without saying that there is scarcely a little girl who hasn’t dreamt of her knight in shining armor coming to rescue her, or her prince charming begging for her hand in marriage.  The fairy tale romances of Cinderella, Snow White and Sleeping Beautyconclude with “happily-ever-after” endings that romance our hearts but hardly epitomize modern day dating and courtship reality.  This is especially true for single Christian women who desire the love and companionship of a godly mate, but for biblical and moral standards refuse to succumb to the worldly culture of “no strings attached” relationships to ease their anguish and loneliness.

As a Christian single - never married – most of my young adult life (I didn’t marry until nearly 40 years of age), I struggled daily to find peace and contentment in my situation.  All through my twenties and thirties I watched friends and colleagues date and marry.  Though sincerely happy that they had found love, my lonely heart grieved the absence of the love and companionship of another.  Through the years I faithfully prayed for a godly mate and companion, and hoped that one day I would know love as God intended it to be shared between a man and a woman.  While God eventually answered this prayer for me, I know that there are still many single women waiting and praying, and in the process struggling to know peace and contentment. 

So how does the single Christian woman find peace and contentment in her singleness?  Speaking from my own experience, I can offer a few suggestions.  First, immerse yourself in God’s Word.  This means both individually through your personal time in Scripture, and corporately as you study God’s Word together with other Christians.  Our peace and contentment is to be found in Christ, yet we live in a world upset by chaos and brokenness, so it’s inevitable that we will struggle to maintain a heart that is content and at peace.  Moreover, there are numerous daily temptations that seek to steal our joy and peace.  It is vital, therefore, that we ground ourselves in Scripture.

1 Corinthians 10:11-13 says, “Now these things happened to [Israel] as an example, but they were written down for our instruction, on whom the end of the ages has come.  Therefore let anyone who thinks that he stands take heed lest he fall.  No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.” Understanding this passage in its larger context, Paul is saying that “the way of escape,” in context of Israel’s mistakes (vv.1-10) “written down for our instruction,” is through studying, knowing, and applying the Word of God to our lives. 
 
Secondly, do not neglect worship and fellowship with other Christians.  Paul tells us in Hebrews 10:24-25, “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.”  This Scripture passage addresses the importance of Christians gathering for the purpose of worship and edification.  The church, the body of Christ, is exactly that – a body.  As such, it has many parts – members within the body.  This body God has so composed that there would be no division in the body, but that the members would have the same care for one another – suffering with those who suffer and rejoicing with those who rejoice (1 Cor. 12:24-26).  So, whether married or single, Christians are called to fellowship together and build up one another as they worship and serve within the body.

Lastly, devote yourself to prayer – for yourself as well as for others.  1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 says,^“Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”  Moreover, we are told in Romans 12:12-13 to “Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.  Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality.”  These Scripture passages tell us that prayer is also about giving thanks and rejoicing in tribulations.  It is also one way that we can “contribute to the needs of the saints” as we pray for others.  Praying for others is especially beneficial because it helps us take our eyes off our own circumstances – our own pain and trials of singleness – and focus on others as we intercede for them in prayer. 
 
While maintaining a spirit of peace and contentment will always be an inevitable struggle, you can be assured that as you immerse yourself in God’s Word, worship with other Christians, and devote yourself to prayer that you will never be robbed of your joy and peace that is found in Christ.
 
In fact, it was with this vision in mind that Corinthian’s Corner created our most popular t-shirt for Christian women.  Inspired by Romans 15:13 (“I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in him”), the Choose Joy tee encourages women to find inner peace by prioritizing their faith.
 
- Peggy, Corinthian's Corner